Two Faith Stories

I know that I write about my faith on here as a Catholic, but lately I have been inspired to go beyond what I know. A month ago I decided to take a leap, and venture out to different religions and churches in order to find similarities. I was discouraged after going to one church, as I went and shared that I was Catholic, and what I wanted to do, they immediately stated that my mission was pointless. They also tried to convert me as well... haha. 

So it was safe to say that I was fully discouraged. At my parish, we have had a mission priest, Fr. Kevin, who is a Redemptorist Priest, come and preach for our Lenten Mission. I have been touched so deeply the past three nights, as I have been attending the services. But last night, was in particular a really influential night for me in so many aspects of my life. One of which, being this mission that I had, but was discouraged to continue. 

Fr. Kevin had mentioned something, that I feel I need to share. Jesus told the apostles to remember him. Now, we all know they do forget a little bit, but the point is they do go back in remembrance of him. But Fr, Kevin stated, the opposite of remember, is not to forget, but to dismember. To pull apart, to split, "black and white, rich and poor, Christian and Muslim". When he said this I felt astounded. I felt the need to share that we all may have different kinds of Faith, but that in the end we all believe in the same God. I was facing such large opposition, but because of that I decided to give up. When Jesus started preaching, and spreading the word of God, Jesus did not give up. When Jesus knew that one of his apostles (Judas) was going to turn him in, Jesus did not turn his back. When Pilate was encountering Jesus for his "treason" Jesus did not take back his word and say "oh goodness I am terribly sorry I am not the son of God". He stuck to his word and who he was. Jesus did not want our world to split, he wanted our world to remain in harmony. 

So, I have gained back my courage, and I have received a lot more ambition, to continue my want to observe different religions. It will take me some time, as there are many different religious outlets on Long Island. But in the meantime, I figured I would share with you two faith stories from different forms of Christianity. 

The first is from a woman that I admire dearly. Her name is Avery, and she has a YouTube channel (SnazzyAvery). She shares thinks like her love of Jesus, different way to Bible Journal (which I LOVE to do), she shares journal flip through videos (which I also LOVE to do), and just many things that are fun, cool, and exciting. When Avery presents a video, her energy is very positive, and it really does rub off on you. So here is her story of how she came to know Christ:

            My story begins sounding like I would have been a believer my whole life, but this wasn’t the case. I lived in confusion that only lead to deeper self-destruction as I grew up, I was searching for happiness in all the wrong places but feeling like I had it all together.

I was born a PK aka... a pastor’s kid.

            I honestly loved it, I loved going to school and bragging about my dad being the boss man at the church next door to my school. I’d walk over after classes were over and hangout with him at the church while he worked on his sermons. My childhood was this church. All the people there became my family and I was either at the church with them, at someone’s house, or hosting small group at our house. I thought my life was the best thing in the WORLD.

            I was blind to the fact that my parent’s marriage was struggling, my dad was struggling at the church, and people at school were actually giving me a hard time for being the innocent little pastor’s daughter.

            Before I knew it, my world turned upside down. My dad left the church which meant my entire family does too of course… so no more 24/7 giant church family. Not too long after this drastic change and hard adjustment my parents announced they were getting a divorce?! Something I thought would NEVER happen. Everything I knew changed instantly. My parents went through a pretty tough time and understandably focused a lot on their own life changes. My two sisters and I felt pretty lost, lonely, and confused.

            From 6^th grade to my sophomore year of college I only went to church on and off with my dad when the family decided to go. So, because I had this Christian foundation I’ve always called myself a believer but never truly understood what that meant until I was on my own in college.

            Two new step parents, a new step sister (love all of them but big adjustments), two long abusive relationships, a hard relationship with my dad, a toxic friend group, poor partying choices, depression, questioning if God even exists, confused by my childhood…

I was lost in the material items of this world, lonely but surrounded by friends high all day and hung over every morning, and looking for answers from a God I wasn’t even sure if I believed in because I wasn’t sure how a God who allowed my life to be this chaotic existed.

God heard me. He never deserted me. He patiently walked along side me until I was ready to walk alongside him. I can look back now and see all the different ways God has been prevalent in my life when I wasn’t deserving of his grace at all. But that’s the amazing thing about serving a good God. He sent his own son to die for all of our transgressions so that we could live fearless and debt free.

I decided to go on a mission trip to Mexico to support my brother in law who is the young adult pastor of my now church. I thought it sounded like a cool opportunity and really wanted to get away from reality at the time.

This trip changed everything.

I saw God move in incredible ways.

In a town of poverty, everyone had so much joy.

I served people and met people of a different language but grew closer relationships with them then people I see every day here.  

I was pulled in by the undeniable joy and faith in a God who so obviously was present in this town.

I was humbled and moved and I didn’t want my life to ever be the same after that.

I came home and made some pretty drastic changes that I had feared for so long before. But after that trip I just felt that God was going to take care of these situations as long as I give them to him.

And he did.

Over the course of that next year, my life turned right side up in so many ways. God revealed himself to me and I am the happiest I have ever been since giving up my life and giving it all to Christ and ultimately seeking what he wants with my life.

I don’t want you to read this and think it was just THAT EASY. Because I struggled for so long and having this reality change wasn’t that long ago.

I struggled almost my entire life questioning:

 why I couldn’t hear God

why it seemed to make sense to other people but not me

why bad things kept happening

why I was so sad but couldn’t pin point why

why I knew things but couldn’t feel them for myself

why why why.

Feeling like I was trying.

But reality is. I wasn’t. I wasn’t putting myself in environments and situations to grow. After the mission trip, I knew what I felt but didn’t know how to hold onto it and make sure I actually lived it out in my life...

SO, I went to church and got involved with my age group, I learned, I served, and surrounded myself with life giving people. People pushing me towards the Lord who genuinely want to go through life with me. Pushing me to be better instead of enabling my own excuses.

God wants to help you through life and doesn’t want you in pain, but he needs you to to actually come to him. Just like any other relationship. Except with Faith, it’s hard when you can’t see God so that’s why all these extra steps are so crucial. A community, and diving into his word.

Once I realized there is so much more to life... a bigger purpose... I went for it; and I only wish I had gone for it long before.

I promise, no matter what is going on in your life. He’s calling out to you. Walk alongside him.

I know. That was very moving. I was shocked when I initially read it as well. The next story is from a dear friend of mine that went on a missions trip to El Salvador with me. Her name is Naomi. During the trip, her love, and her desire to have this close RELATIONSHIP with Jesus really moved me in so many ways. Watching her talk about her love and her desire for Jesus was like taking a big gulp of fresh air. She had shared her story once in front of a small crowd in a form of a speech, but she is very open about her experiences and her faith. Here is her story:

                     Morning! My name is Naomi Perez, I  grew up going to the Hudson Valley region of the New York City Church of Christ, this church.  My parents became Christians in this church a few months before I was born, so I’ve been surrounded by people who love God since before I came into the world.

    Growing up, I was always considered the “good girl,” at home, in the church and even at school.  I loved going to church and singing and spending time with my “church friends.”  When I entered the teen ministry, I became known as one of the “power teens.”  That was just a group of us kids who openly loved church, we were the ones to answer all the questions and would be at all the events. But little by little, my curiosity about the outside world continued to grow.

    Let me just be upfront and say… I love boys.  I lived in a house with siblings/cousins that were between 3 and 10 years older than me; three of which were boys.  I learned pretty quickly how to become “one of the guys.”  In the teen ministry, I was the only girl out of the six other boys my age.  So, building relationships with boys became extremely natural for me.  They just seemed easier to get along with, they cared less about drama and more about sports and I was all for it.  They also (conveniently) “always” seemed to remind me how cool and pretty they thought I was.  Who wouldn’t want that?

    I tried studying the Bible two separate times before my junior year in high school.  I couldn’t seem to connect with God’s word. I just kept expecting some sort of overwhelming emotion or feeling to come over me, but prayer after prayer I felt nothing.  I got so fed up that I took it upon myself to pray Jesus out of my life.  I told him I was tired of trying and that I was going to ignore everything I learned and live completely according to the way of the world.

    And that’s exactly what I did.  Three days after my 16th birthday, I gave away my virginity to a guy I thought I was in love with… I wasn’t, we broke up and the guilt of not being a virgin was intense.  I decided to remedy that guilt by giving myself to another guy.  This time, I convinced myself that since I already had sex before that it would be okay to have sex with someone else as long as I trusted them.  By my senior year of high school, I started to open up to the Bible enough to actually pay attention in church.  I learned so much about how deeply God loved us.  Me being me, I took that information and essentially made myself the God of my boyfriend at the time.  I loved him so much that I wanted to give him the gift of my body to show him how much I cared about him.  I idolized boys so much that I needed them as my fuel so I just continued to ignore the Bible.  

Every relationship I had ended badly.  The one guy pretends I don’t exist, I have a restraining order against another and my last boyfriend was never willing to come to church with me, let alone allow me to freely express my desire for God.  I knew that none of these relationships were the type of love God had intended for me; I never felt fulfilled.

    Obviously, I’m nowhere close to being God.  In Romans 1:21-25 its says, “For although they knew God, they never glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.  Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like a mortal human being and birds and animals and reptiles.  Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another.  They exchanged the truth about God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator - who is forever praised.  Amen.”  It continues on in verse 28 to say, “Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done.  They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity.  They are full on envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice.  They are gossips, slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent new ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; they have no understanding, no fidelity, no love, no mercy.  Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these things but also approve of those who practice them.”  Wow… that was me; right there in the Bible in black and white… I felt like God just put my whole life on blast.  This scripture made me feel deeply empty and incredibly humbled; I finally saw my need for God, and I needed him bad.

It wasn’t until this last time around studying the bible again, that I realized that a relationship with God is not just a feeling.  I was so caught up in boys that I never gave God a chance to pursue me. Boys were my God.  It took a long time wrestling with scriptures to even come to terms with the fact that the thing I valued most was what had been keeping me the furthest from God.  In 1 Peter 4:3 the Bible says “for you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do.”  I was finally ready to tear down my walls and create a new foundation in Christ.

    So, on February 11, 2018 I made it official with my boo Jesus and got baptized! And honestly, Jesus is the best boyfriend I could have/will ever have.  He has never left my side, has never broken a single promise, always gives the best advice, he keeps me safe; the list goes on and on… Jesus is literally perfect.

I just want to encourage you guys to get open about your lives.  Talk about whatever it is that could be keeping you from seeking a relationship with God.  Don’t let anything, especially boys, get in the way of being with Christ.  Even if it’s tough or you have to try studying the bible many times, Jesus is well worth it.

Thanks for listening to me!

We all have our own encounters. Our own ways, our own experiences that allow us to venture into the light of Christ. Not every path is squeaky clean. Not every path starts off righteous either. Every path is different, and each person has a certain belief, that is just a little bit different. I am so excited to continue moving forward on this journey to encounter different forms of Christianity and religions, as Jesus did not intend for a dis-membership, but a remembrance.