Self-Care is not Selfish: Put "you" into your day!

    

   One of the most common misconceptions in today's world is that caring for yourself is one of the most selfish things a person can do. Well, this is WRONG!!! People actually don't care for themselves enough, which can lead to poor affects on your mental health. I am one of those people. I happen to care so much for everything else in life, my jobs, my school work, my future, that I don't actually sit down and take the time out of my day to care for me. 

   The absence of me has actually led me to plateau on the aspect of my mental health growth. But this is not something that people really recognize easily, I actually needed to be removed from my current situation for a day to figure this out for myself. This past weekend I went on a retreat to Harmony Farm's Empowerment Center in Goshen, NY. I was asked to help lead the retreat, which of course I did, but little did I know that I needed this retreat. What happened to me, which happens to everyone, is that we all get so caught up in our daily lives. We go through the motions of the day as usual, for me its wake up, go to work, go to school, go to sleep. A never ending cycle. When you get so caught up in this repetitive and cyclical routine you leave out you in your day. This may sound like a paradox, but it is true. 

   It is known that a part of keeping up and maintaining your mental health is to take care of you. Actually, a lot of mental health is about taking care of you. But when you block out the "you" out of your day... what do you have left? The retreat that I went on was a spiritual retreat, and I have certainly learned A LOT about myself and what I need to keep me going. I learned that it is essential that I take time out of my day to put my phone down, to block out my home life stress, to stop thinking about my future, and to just live in the present moment. I had removed myself from my daily life to stay one night on a farm, but that one night on a farm has given me more rest than I have had in a long time. I found ways where I can add God into my life, I found ways where I can add me into my daily routine. 

   But being selfish and caring for yourself is not the same. Everyone needs to care for themselves. If you don't, you get stuck in some sort of time lapse like I was stuck. It is especially very hard to break free from such cycles. If you need to take a day where you don't talk to anyone, take it! If you need a Friday or Saturday night where you don't want to feel pressured to go out and you just want to enjoy a night for yourself, you make sure you have a night in! If you need to stop talking to some friends because they are bad influences on you, stop talking to them! One thing I have learned is that the only person that will ever pick you up when you are down is you, and God is with you while you redeem yourself. 

   You are not denying the love of your neighbor by taking a day, a few hours, one hour, or a few minutes to take a step back and love you. You need to love yourself before you can love your neighbor. So when you wake up tomorrow morning, or when you go to bed tonight, make sure you step back and ask yourself if you added time for "you" in your routine. If you didn't, try and find ways to be you! To take care of you! To love you! 

I dare you to take the time to smile today. Smile to yourself in the mirror, and smile to a stranger! Spread the love :)